Can't do positivity

Well in hopes of trying to be grateful this month and see all the good around me I was writing this I was grateful for but when everything around you seems to be falling apart I just cannot brig myself to write down everyday what I am grateful for.

I know I have a lot to be grateful for even through hard times but honestly right now I just want to have a self pity party.

Every day is something new. This week I have not had one single day off and have had to cancel plans and put my child in tears as I tell him I have to go to work instead of hang out with him like planned.

I no longer get shocked when I hear bad news. Nothing surprises me. There are days where I feel something or someone has it out for me cause everything that could go wrong in one day will.

The crappy part is that it's not on a get any easier from here on till God knows when.

I wake up every day ready to love life and have my smile on and be happy and it happens but by the end of the day of I don't take an energy drink I am a complete downer.

Thank goodness my husband is has his sense of humor and continues to make me laugh. If it weren't for my sweet child too I don't know what I would do. This boy has been and angel as of lately nothing short of perfection, honestly. He wakes up every morning calling me precious and telling me how sweet I am and how much he loves me. So because of these 2 in my life I continue to wake up and try to see the good in life.